The Package reads “Made with Stone Ground Yellow Corn”, but they taste like they are “Corn Made with Ground Yellow Stone”.  These chips were so hard and uncomfortable to eat, they made my soul’s jaw ache.

Trader Joe’s has, in the past, made some decent chips.  They have never been great, but adequate for human consumption and a convenient purchase if you are already at a Trader Joe’s.  But there has been a steady decline in their snack line, particularly with corn chips.  It’s not as if the chips are past the “best by” date, but still somehow they have a staleness.  But worse than being merely stale, these Salted Tortilla Chips have a texture that hints that they may have been made from thin, marble slabs rather than corn tortillas.  The taste is fine (fine, not great), but the texture is course and completely unacceptable.

This isn’t a review, it’s a warning

I am not saying don’t buy Trader Jose’s Salted Tortilla Chips.  If you love Trader Joe’s and hate good tortilla chips and want to make sure that Trader Joe’s continues to produce malicious chips designed to repulse instead of satisfy, then buy these by the box.  Go ahead and waste allocate your money however you like. But for the sake of your teeth, and the teeth of those you love, DO NOT EAT THESE TORTILLA CHIPS.

Only if we are united can we crush these fraudulent tortilla chips…

…because they are so hard no one can do it alone.

And judging by the Trader Joe’s Surfboards (another chip that seeks to murder mandibles everywhere), there is a mission on the part of Trader Joe’s to pervert what good people think is an edible tortilla chip.  Trader Joe’s is now completely in-house in their snack department and we can no longer depend on Barbara’s and other fine snack food makers to present an acceptable form of snack.  And this makes me wonder if it is in fact Trader Joe’s vision to make us hate snack foods so much that we forego them completely for “organic” produce, and kombucha.

Well, I will resist!

I will stand firm (like a Trader Jose’s Salted Tortilla Chip) against these imposter chips.  Even to the point of eating other average tortilla chips, such as Mission, and Santita’s, in protest.